10 Year Old Post #1: Why Toast is misleading and deceptive

6.11.2006

Why Toast is misleading and deceptive.

I have complete understanding when it comes to Microsoft bashing. I WORK for MS, yet I use alternative products. Why? Sometimes for price (Open Office), sometimes for features (Firefox), sometimes as a statement (Gaim). So, I am all about calling MS on it’s bull$41+.

But, what I am not all about, is what David Berlind has done. It is this piece about how sneaky MS is for their “Windows Genuine Advantage” install.

With statements like “the text is somewhat misleading… it leaves you with the impression that all you have to do is click there and the updates will go about installing themselves with no intervention from the user. ” which imply that he is expecting something sinister and DOESN’T get it or “After I was pretty sure that this round of updates didn’t include the Windows Genuine Advantage component, I backed up to the screen where I had the choice of doing either an Express or Custom installation and “OK’d” the Express Installation” where he goes down a path looking for tricks, doesn’t find them and, instead of continuing, goes back and takes another path based on his own [incorrect] assumptions.

I understand what he is trying to say here. I might even agree with him. But my problem is, Mr. Berlind has taken a short blog post and, using screen shots and hyperbole, has extended it into something long enough that it end up on ZDNet.

I’m about to take you into a long winded mockery of this article, so you might want to go read it first just so you will get the full enjoyment of my scorn. David, you don;t need to read it, after all, you wrote it and that must have been painful enough.

I think this article is comparable to me posting something about making toast which, instead of saying “I made toast” says something like this:

I decided to toast some bread this morning, knowing full well that bread can cause choking and toasters are very dangerous in the shower, so I went into the kitchen.

On entering the kitchen, it was clear that things were not as they seem. In spite of the pretty pictures on the walls, there were knives hidden in drawers, a blender with blades that could kill me and pots heavy enough to knock me out. I continued in with reservations.

Once I got to the refrigerator, I saw that there was only a simple handle, with no indications as to what might be waiting for me inside this heavy, earthquake based weapon. I decided (for the sake of this article and my faithful readers) to open it anyway. Big mistake.

Openening the fridge resulted in a COMPLETELY unexpected gust of cold air which, due to my open bathrobe (why was I not warned to close it?!?!?), resulted in some very uncomfortable nether regions.

I took the loaf of bread out of the bag, being careful to not get the bag on my head yet again (shouldn’t there be a notice on the bag?) and grabbed a piece of bread.

Ok, here’s where we hit the first huge problem. IT RIPPED FROM MY AMAZINGLY STRONG GRIP! Money down the drain because the designers couldn’t take the time to think about usability. Sigh. I went back and got another piece.

Putting the bread in the toaster I thought to myself, hmm, ok, so this is going to toast my bread. Since I was sure that this assumption was correct, I went back and put the bread into the blender. Guess what? NOT TOASTED! NOT AT ALL!

The End.

Here’s the deal. There are a MILLION OS’s out there. Go use one. Windows is the most pervasive, most supported and most comprehensive OS out there. That’s why I use it. Because, ultimately, I want to “Get Things Done”, not screw with my OS.

I have a license for my OS. Most people do. I also have a firewall which tells me what is happening on my system. So, in the end, I let MS have as much information as I decide I want to.

Some of you will say “but there are Unexperienced End Users out there! They must be protected!”. Hmm, there are unexperienced fork lift drivers out there too, should we remove the tongs and engine? What about unexperienced eaters? Infants are an EXCELLENT reason to remove the tongs from forks, the edge from a knife, etc.

No. Dammit. If you are going to use something, you learn how to use and control it, or you live with the consequences. Dumbass. Stop trying to save the world from Microsoft. Try saving the world from the real evil out there….. Real Networks and Apple Quicktime.

LOL, see? I don;t practice what I preach cause I don;t preach to idiots like me 🙂

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